Rabu, 22 September 2010


I can't sleep. 
It's late, almost midnight. 
My father got sick and has to go to the hospital,staying for a week. I wish him get well very very soon.
Me and my crush just had a little mess but we can get it right again :)
I texted him but no answer. I think he has no pulse. I hope I was right.  I don't want another war.
My sister will go back to Cilegon tomorrow morning. I pray her for a safe flight cause I heard It's been a bad weather at Jakarta, err Surabaya as well.
I don't know who will accompany me at home for a week later, as my mother also stays at hospital, takes care of my father.
I really need an accompanied.
I need him so bad :'(

p.s. love your family whatever happens, whatever your parents fussy to you. Stop complaining and start being grateful of what you have today, for health, happiness, peaceful, prosperous and love surround you

lots of pray,

Jumat, 10 September 2010


I am happy right now.
Yes, the considerably happiness I never have before.
I can't even tell you how does it feel.
All I know is I feel happy...

When those 12 unread messages from you popped out on my screen
When you get used to sending me a morning message
When you never tired reminding me to eat, pray and get sleep
When you start worrying about me
When you tell your day as you wanted to tell it only to me
When you are the first person I talk to in the morning and the last person I talk to in the night
When your name is the first name that I always see on my screen every time I get up from my slumber
When you change your bedtime only to accompany me all night long
When I feel like I miss you so much and you accidentally come out

It's when there is you
It feels like home 



Senin, 06 September 2010

holiday - day 2

he texted me this morning.
i wake up and flew up.

the wait will be worth it.
yes, keep it in mind 
oh, how really simple thing can made my day :-)

Rabu, 01 September 2010


Hey, what's up?

Anyway, I've been thinking for days about relationship between me and my friend. Yes,he's a boy. We've been so much closer for 3 months lately. I enjoy every second of it. I love how the way he takes care about me. He even knows that I don't eat my supper yet before I told him! We frequently chat, like almost everyday. The conversation takes hours till I lay on my bed. We do very well interaction. I guess, he enjoys what we've been through as well. 

FYI, he's my extracurricular mate. We are in a same base, SGG (I've told you about it in my older post). It's the place where all the story began. Well, I actually knew him since I entered SMADA. He's one of my eye catcher. Everybody admit that he has a good looking, almost perfect, yes, literally. My buddy and I started adoring him since 10th grade, but It was just an adore, no more than that. I like seeing him around. 
One day, he joined SGG when we were on 11th grade. It was a bit shocking yet I'm uber happy thus I wouldn't have to make so much effort just for seeing his wonderful smile. As the days go by, we do a lot of things together and getting know each other deeper. I was like seeing something different in his eyes when he looked at me. I have no idea what was that but I felt warm. Every time I spend with him, I grow so much more happiness inside that I go home with a big smile. It's not only those warm eyes I love, but also the conversations we made. I know it's way less 'wow' than the conversations I made with my ex-crush but there's something different I can't describe. He gives a new atmosphere and makes it interesting with his own way. Moreover, he does many little things that nobody can do. Yes, he grabbed my heart :)

However, sadly I'd say that he doesn't tell anything about his feeling to me yet. I don't know why. Some of my friends said that he hesitates to take a risk. He ever failed on a relationship he made and it hurt him so bad. On the other hand, the rest of them said that he's just fooling around. I asked for advices to my buddies and got some different answers. One side told me to leave him while the other side told me to wait and stay as long as I can.
After a looong brain-storming,I decided that I'll just enjoy the circumstance. As long as I'm happy and got what I need, It's fine.But one thing for sure,I shouldn't let my heart takes too much part on it as one of my best buddy said 

"...jalanin aja seneng-seneng bareng, tp kalo dia blm kasih kepastian,jangan masukin ke ati. Apapun itu..."